Funny graduation speech

Graduation Speech:

I Would Like To Thank,

The Internet, Google, Wikipedia,
Microsoft 0ffice And
Copy Paste. . . !! =P =D

Wonderful confession by a girl & amazing reply

Wonderful confession by a girl in church and amazing reply she got

She:i m in love with a boy who is far away from me

I m in india and he lives in uk

We met on marriage website

Became friends on fb

Had long chats on whatsapp

Proposed each other on skype

N now 2 months of relationship through viber

I need ur blessings and good wish oh god

Guy besides her said: now get married on twitter

Have fun on tango

Buy your kids from ebay

Send them through gmail

And if u r fed up with ur husband or kids toh unko OLX pe bech de

I'm talking to my wife

Man outside phone booth: Excuse me !!
You are holding the phone since 20 mins.
&
haven't spoken a word..!!!
Man inside: I'm talking to my wife

Promise me we are true friends

Promise me we are true friends
I am lamp you are light
I am Coke you are Sprite
I am Sawan you are badal
I am Normal you are Pagal
I am Water you are Tanki
I am Tarzan you are Monkey

Friends are like fishes

Friends r like fishes.
U have to sit patiently for a long time
to catch a good one.
Just like I caught u.
so better stay nice otherwise
I will FRY YOU..;)

A love letter from biscuit maker

A love letter from biscuit maker:
Dear marie, today is good day,
u r anmol for me...
but u have crack jacked my heart,
bcoz i have a little heart,
now i m in 50/50 position...

Even if most beautiful girl is picked,

If a man is allowed to select a girl

from 90 girls

and

Even if most beautiful is picked,

There's still the pain of losing

the remaining EIGHTY NINE....:p

A Belated Teachers' Day

A Belated Teachers' Day
Its A Humble Request
"80% Of Teachers r
Suffering From Throat
Pain By Teaching Students."
So Plz
.
.
.
.
BUNK d Classes As Much
As Possible
n
Save Our Teachers

A man received an unknown call..

A man received an unknown call..
Girl : hello do you have a gf??
Man : no, who are you darling?
Girl : M ur girl friend Diana, hate u
Again man got a call
Girl : do u have a gf??
Man : yes darling
Girl : m ur wife Alice, hate u
Man : oh sorry honey i didn't recognise u
Girl : m Diana i knew it that u have a wife, Hate u liar...
Man : wtf..... :-P:-D

Independance day date

Bubbli got caugt on date
on Independance day
.
Major Rohail-
What is this?
.
Bubbli-
Dad today is freedom day,
so let me do what I want

By wife ....

Police Officer: I arrest people, But, when I go home, I'm under house arrest, by Wife
Professor: I give lectures to students, But, when I go home, I get Lectured hourly, by wife
CEO: I'm the Boss, But, when I go home, I always feel like an employee, by wife
Judge: I give Justice, but when I go home, I Beg for Justice, by wife

Husband wife watching an IPL match together

Husband wife watching an IPL match together:
After 5 minutes:
Wife: Is this Bret Lee?
Husband: No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler.
Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket.
Husband: No, this is just a replay of the last one.
Wife: Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one.
Husband: It's Bangalore vs Mumbai.
Wife: How many runs they need to win now?
Husband: 72 runs in 36 balls.
Wife: Eh! That's easy, just 2 runs in 1 ball.
Husband: *Turns off the TV*
Wife: Turns it on again and starts watching "Daily serial"
Husband: Who is girl here ?
Wife: Don't disturb me please .

I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET

Boss hangs a poster in Office
"I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET"
He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk.
"Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home."